Monday, May 9, 2011

The real me :)


This picture represents the true me. I was 17 and I was at a Backstreet Boys concert with my older sister/best friend Greta. I was absolutely obsessed with the Backstreet Boys when I was in elementary school. I saw them in concert when I was in 3rd grade, and seeing them again was literally one of the best nights of my life. I felt like elementary school Annie again! I may or may not have cried. Multiple times. Also, it was so wonderful to be there with my sister. She's not only my co-BSB fanatic, but she is the person that I've always felt most "myself" around. It's one of my favorite memories with her, and this picture totally captures that.

Masked.

At Wheaton, I think academic pressure and perfectionism are kind of like the bronze serpent. Most people will jokingly admit they're an over-achiever or that they feel overwhelmed, but I feel like a lot of people don't see it as a problem, much less a problem that needs to be solved. I think these issues are seen as something that just comes with the package of going to Wheaton, and may even be necessary to doing well. Pressure and perfectionism are things that the administration and faculty have brought up before. I've had countless professors tell me that I shouldn't work on Sundays, that I should go to bed before midnight, that I should value relationships over homework. I have a hard time discerning whether or not they actually believe what they are selling us is possible. I've tried, and there's no way all of those things can happen. You can choose to have relationships and studies, but you won't be in bed by midnight. You can take Sundays off, but be prepared for no social life on Friday and Saturday. You can sleep enough and get your work done to your professor's standards, but you're going to be working on the Sabbath. I feel that Wheaton wants to state that pressure and perfectionism exist but don't really want to condemn them because at the end of the day we are an academic institution, and grades rule in an academic institution. I've had multiple professors encourage us to take a lower grade on a paper or study less if a friend is having a problem. Relationships, of course, are more important in the Kingdom. But I highly doubt I would actually receive grace on a project because I was up with my roommate whose life was falling apart. I even had a professor flat out tell me, "Don't ask me for grace because you were up late with a friend or roommate. I'm not graceful. Jesus is." So we are encouraged to make the sacrifice for what's more important in the Kingdom, but at the end of the day our feet are still held to the fire of deadlines. I guess I just wish Wheaton would either address pressure and perfectionism as a problem that they want to resolve, or not address it at all. Because this sneaky "God doesn't expect you to be a perfectionist but we do because that is how you meet our standards" thing is getting kind of tiresome. So let's all look at the serpent of pressure and perfectionism and realize that if we actually want to be "For Christ and His Kingdom" we need to walk our talk. Or not talk at all.

Mask movie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNidT3KNztc